Vote For Your Favorite Muppet

Here is the extent of the politics you'll get from my blog.   Today I pose 2 questions to you, my fellow Americans.

1. Were Guy Smiley and Mitt Romney separated at birth?

   

 2.Who has a better chance of being president?

Next, I think I have to figure out who Michele Bachmann looks like. 
It looks like she's going to be a fun topic, too.

First Whitey, Now What?

They killed Osama Bin Laden.  They caught Whitey Bulger.  Anything is possible.   Maybe even these things...

-Politicians will stop wasting time trying to ban same-sex marriage.

-Aerosmith will stop bickering like school kids on a playground,.

-The New England Revolution can finally end their drought and join the other teams in title town (this was actually meant for the Bruins until last week)

-Jay Leno will become funny.

-We will find a cure for cancer

-Caillou will stop whining.

-Local TV news people will stop the witty banter and just report the news.

-Gas prices will go back to $1.85 a gallon.

Feel free to add your own...remember ANYTHING is possible.

UUUUUUUUKKKKKKKE!!!

The new Eddie Vedder CD "Ukulele Songs" has a memorable cover and beautiful detailed packaging.  It's worth your money just for the cover and artwork, although the music is excellent, too (It's totally different than Pearl Jam, so open your mind.)  I don't want to sound older than I am, but this artwork is a pleasure to see.

For years, the art form of album/CD covers seemed to be forgotten. When CD's first came out, some didn't have ANYTHING on the inside covers. No lyrics, no musician credits, no pictures, nothing.  Actually, some had mumbo jumbo about cleaning the disc, source noise, and the attempt to preserve the original sound as closely as possible.

Artists work hard on cover and packaging concepts as part of the expression of their ideas. Leaving them out or compromising those ideas is just plain wrong. Would Dark Side Of The Moon (awesome stickers,) Led Zeppelin 3 (cut-out art you could spin,) Some Girls (rotating faces and wigs,) Kiss Alive 2 (tattoos and concert program,) or Waiting For The Sun (entire "Celebration of The Lizard" lyrics printed inside,) have been the same without the memorable artwork? Nope.

So kudos to Eddie Vedder for putting out a really different sounding album, with hand printed lyrics and pages of photos that sum up the feeling of the music.  Here's hoping more artists embrace their inner classic album packaging. And maybe Congressman Anthony Weiner will put out an album with a real zipper on it. Oh wait, that's been done.

Shut The Blank Up

A review of Eddie Vedder at the Wang Theater June 16, 2011, and an ode to a certain kids book sweeping the internet.

I'm at a concert.  I like to listen and watch.  But you just want to drink and talk and talk and talk.
I wish I could enjoy myself, but you won't shut the blank up.

Those beers you're drinking, not one at a time but two,  might be better in your stomach rather than underneath my shoe.
I'd like to watch the show, but you won't shut the blank up.

I know this is your favorite song.  You yelled it a million times.
Rather than hear you scream all through it, I'd like to hear the singer's lines.
I'd like to watch the show, but you won't shut the blank up.

You're from Rockland.  How do I know? You yelled it out during the show.
I was trying to hear the singer's stories, not learn about you, bro.
I'd like to watch the show, but you won't shut the blank up.

This concert had great stories and funny lines.  I only heard half becuase you seemed to be drinking for the first time.
The four of you talking about random things made it hard to hear.  I wondered if you thought you were at a keg party rather than here.
I'd like to watch the show, but you won't shut the blank up.

I had a good time but without you it could have been better.  But thanks for reminding me every 3 seconds who I was seeing by yelling "Eddie Vedder."

Think Big, Man

Clarence Clemons of the E-Street Band suffered a stroke this past weekend.  Bruce Springsteen fan or not, I hope you join me in wishing him well.  No one should have to suffer through that.  At least he has friends, fans and family to support him.  We should all be so lucky.  Below is a statement from Bruce, updates from Clarence's family and the Springsteen fan site Backstreets, and an e-mail address to send a message to Clarence.  I did.  Maybe you will, too.  Thanks to Mark Felsot of Little Steven's Underground Garage for keeping us up to date.

  

From brucespringsteen.net
By now, many of you have heard that our beloved comrade and sax player Clarence Clemons has suffered a serious stroke. While all initial signs are encouraging, Clarence will need much care and support to achieve his potential once again. He has his wonderfully supportive wife, Victoria, excellent doctors and health care professionals, and is surrounded by friends and family.
I thank you all for your prayers and positive energy and concern. This is a time for us all to share in a hopeful spirit that can ultimately inspire Clarence to greater heights.
-- Bruce Springsteen

From Clarence's familyDot-net also brings welcome news for all those wondering how to send well-wishes to the Big Man: "Clarence's family appreciates your concern and wants to let you know that you can send him your wishes via e-mail to notestoclarence@clarenceclemons.com"- June 14, 2011

MAY YOUR HOPE GIVE US HOPEThe mood at the hospital today is "upbeat," a close friend of Clarence Clemons tells Backstreets. "It's sort of status quo right now, but the status quo is good. We're amazed — the doctors are amazed at the advances he's made. Bear in mind, he's still machine-assisted. But his vital signs continue to improve, and the goal is to wean him off each machine as he gets stronger."
No matter what, despite Clarence doing better than anyone expected, "It's going to be a long haul. There's a lot he'll have to relearn. But we're hopeful for a full recovery. We don't yet know if it's possible, but the movement and responsiveness on his left side is a good sign. More than anything, we want people to know how much we appreciate their prayers, all the fans keeping Clarence in their thoughts. It's coming in from all ends of the earth. And right now, those prayers are coming true." - June 14, 2011    

Deep Thoughts With....

Do you get your life's advice from professional sports figures? I don't.  Not to stereotype, but I usually need something a little more inspirational than "Play one game at a time,"  "You gotta tip your cap to them," or "We just need to play our game."  Sure, those are all kinda true, but they're pretty one-dimensional and obvious.

But Tim Wakefield (who is by far the classiest Red Sox player) said something really cool during the marathon rain delay coverage in last night's Red Sox Yankees game. It was a simple, obvious statement, yet it made me think. To be honest, it's the first time in a long time a professional sports player inspired me to think about much.  It's applicable to many facets of life: work, sports, friendship, hobbies, family, etc.   I didn't take it as cliche because I had never heard it. 

He said:  "There's a reason the windshield is bigger than the rear-view mirror." 


Really deep?  No.  But true.  There's a lot coming at us.  Be ready for it and pay attention to it.  Of course, we should remember the past, but don't obsess on it.  I love that.  Tim Wakefield is in his 17th year with the Red Sox nearing his 200th win.  He has pitched anywhere and everywhere they asked him to.  He must be doing something right.  Is he right-on or am I just not that deep?  Don't answer that, please.

All I Learned About Life, I Learned By Seeing Phish

I love the band Phish.  If you love them, you get it.  If you don't get it, I won't force it on you. I understand not everyone will.   But in an effort to explain why I like them, I've created a Phish "self-help" guide.    Apply these things Phish does to your life and maybe it will improve.

Mix it up.  Phish never plays the same show twice.  They have hundreds of songs to pick from and you never know what you'll get on any given night.  This element of suprise keeps it exciting. 

Take chances and don't be afraid to make mistakes.  Phish plays all sorts of fun, different covers.  Some work, some don't, but they take the shot.  Just a few notable examples:  "Purple Rain" (with a vacuum cleaner solo;) "Freebird" Acapella (even the guitar solos;) Beastie Boys' "Sabotage;"  Rolling Stones' "Lovin Cup;"  Led Zeppelin's "No Quarter;" and the other night, John Lennon's "Instant Karma!"

Listen to each other and trust each other.  Phish is a jam band. The jams sometimes follow one groove, but any member of the band can often take it to different places at any given time.  The other members listen and try to follow.  It's more jazz than rock at times. To challenge their trust, they create new ways to practice, even blindfolded sometimes. But it wouldn't work if they didn't listen and trust each other.   



Have fun.  Duh! Phish smile, laugh, and joke onstage.  It's not unprofessional, it's fun.  Have at home, have fun at work, and have fun in public.
Can a rock band change your life?  Who knows?  But we can can all benefit from some improv, change,hard work and fun sometimes.    But, unlike Jon Fishman,  I probably won't be wearing a dress anytime soon.

I Got Your Food Pyramid Right Here

I had a sandwich from a tray the other day with a weird tasting sauce on it (keep your jokes to yourself.) Because it was free and I was in a place I couldn't really make a huge deal about it, I kept eating and tried to figure out what it was. Sometimes it's fun to deconstruct a sandwich and figure out what's in it (kind of like "CSI: My Mouth.") Well, as I was nearly halfway done, I realized what it was. An apple. And it made me do this.

OK, you foodies out there, get ready to call me a heathen.

I HATE FRUIT IN MY LUNCH AND DINNER.

There I said it (and I made the "all caps police" mad, too)

Now, I have no problem with people who like fruit in their dinner/lunch or even serve it. Everyone has their own tastes, right? Just don't expect me to eat it.

Fruit is a fine breakfast item. It's an even better mid morning or late afternoon snack. But when you put it my sandwich or on my plate of meat and starches, I get that look Eddie Murphy gets in Trading Places when the Dukes explain that you might find bacon in a bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwich.

So please enjoy your chicken salad with grapes or your apple stuffed pork to yourself. Unless you're talking about Hawaiian Pizza with ham and pineapple. In which case, forget everything I just said.

I'm Just Talkin' Bout Shaq

Shaquille O'Neal retired.  That's a big deal.  I'll be honest. I don't know much about basketball. But I do know about larger-than-life characters, and Shaq is one of them. For a guy who didn't even play an entire season here, he sure made an impact in Boston. And I don't just mean on the court.

Shaq embraced this town like no other athlete has done in such a short time. He changed his nickname to the Big Shamrock when he announced he was coming to Boston. Now that's embracing a city. He stood in line with students at the Harvard bookstore. He was sometimes even seen shopping at his local Target. (And really, how could you miss the guy?)

The Shaq brand is about fun, community, and show-biz. He extended that brand without tainting or belittling the Celtics brand. He communicated through his Twitter account, staging stunts like sitting like a statue and posing for pictures with fans, or handing out gifts to kids as Shaq a claus. He even announced his retirement on Twitter, giving the fans who followed him closely the first chance to react. He's now asking those fans to tweet a new nickname for him.

His presence was undeniable on the court, even hurt. I think the Celtics might have gone further with him (said the guy who didn't know much about basketball.) But I know the city will miss the fun he brought, the smiles he generated, and the Comcast commercials he did with Ben Stein. Okay, maybe we won't miss those. Good luck Shaq!

People vs Nature Again

My thoughts and prayers go out to the people, families, and businesses affected by yesterday's tornadoes here in Massachusetts.

I grew up in a neighboring city of Springfield and there are two things I never thought I'd see:
1)  This kind of damage caused by tornadoes here.  Springfield, Missouri, maybe.  NOT Springfield Massachusetts.

2) A textbook video of how a tornado is formed....shot in downtown Springfield over the Connecticut River. I have always been fascinated by tornadoes.  Check out this video and behold the power of nature. And take those tornado warnings seriously.