Holla! City Of Squalor!

I helped "The Hangover Part 2" earn $105 million over the weekend (well, $5.75 of it, anyway.)   I'm sure you want to know what I thought (or I'll just humor myself and pretend you do.)   I won't give you a "review" because I'm not a professional movie critic.  Instead, I'll answer a few questions about the movie that I might ask of someone who saw it.    No plot spoilers (I hate when people do that.)  Just honest answers.

"How was it?"  It was good!  It was a hot day, and it gave me 2 hours of mindless fun and laughs in an air-conditioned theater.  That's all I want out of a movie.

"Was it as good as the first one?" Define "as good as."  I laughed out loud quite a few times and was horrified at other times.  That's what happened when I saw the first one.

"I hear it's the same as the first movie.  Is that true?" Yes and no.  The plot is almost identical. They basically took the same story structure and applied it to different time and places.  It works, but unlike the first movie, you already know what happens.  You kind of have to expect that because it's a sequel.

"Without giving anything away, can you give me some hints about what was funny?" An awesome version of Billy Joel's "Allentown; A hilarious Long John Silver's reference; Stu meets another lady; Alan has the best lines (again.) 

Bottom line:  This is what I expected.  They didn't break any new ground, but they never promised they would.

If you have any questions about "The Hangover Part 2," please feel free to ask and I'll answer to the best of my ability.

Remember The Heroes

Ahhh, the 3-day Memorial Day weekend is here.  Last week we turned the heat on to warm up the house, now it's Summer.  And while we all spend Memorial Day weekend relaxing, grilling, and celebrating the coming of Summer, let's make sure we take a few minutes to reflect on why we can do all this. 

We have freedom given to us by many men and women, our fellow citizens.   Too many of them died fighting to keep that freedom.  We remember them on Memorial Day.  Here is the history of Memorial Day.  Observe it any way you want.  But observe it.  Put out your flag.   Thank a veteran.  Thank a current member of the military.  Check out a parade.  Help this war hero's father's effort to honor his son and all the others resting with his son with 50,000 flags.  Take a few minutes to sit quietly and think about the sacrifices so many have made.  Explain Memorial Day to your kids.  Tell them how lucky and privileged we are to live in a country this great.

Thanks to all the veterans, fallen heroes, and current servicemen and women. My thoughts, prayers, and thanks go to them and their families.  God bless America. 

     

There's 2 Hours I'll Never Get Back

The other night, I got sucked into watching "The Hangover" AGAIN. I had no intention of watching it. I've already seen it plenty of times. But every time I watch it, I laugh out loud like the first

time. And "The Hangover" isn't the only movie like this. There are some movies I just can't say "no" to.

Trading Places: Great plot twists, brilliant cast, and love the classic John Landis "characters looking at the camera" move.  And Clarence Beeks is now my favorite fake name to use.

Jaws: Yes, I already know what happens...but I still have to watch. I loved this movie so much as a kid, I recorded the audio off the TV onto cassette before they invented the VCR (Kids-the VCR is what we had before DVR's. And cassettes had just audio, no video. I know, right?)

The Blues Brothers-Best musical ever made. Before you argue, did the Wizard of Oz have a car chase through a mall? Did John Candy ask everyone at the table if they wanted an Orange Whip in the Sound Of Music? And did any scene of West Side Story take place at Bob's Country Bunker?  The defense rests. Best. Musical. Ever. Made.

Gran Torino-Clint Eastwood has always played great "gruff guys" but he is also a brilliant filmmaker. Here, he combines film making, storytelling and one of the toughest/sweetest characters he's played. You know you can't resist the scene where Walt goes to the housing project.

The Godfather-Ok, it's just unfair to show this. They usually show parts 1 and 2 together, making it longer than most camping trips.

Is there some sort of unwritten law that says I have to watch these movies?

Maybe a hidden code embedded in them that hypnotizes me to watch them?

Am I the only one who can't just turn away or change the channel when a good movie I've already seen comes on?

My kids are growing up and I'm missing it.  I need TV to show more boring chick flicks, so I can get back to being a responsible husband, parent, and citizen.

What movie can't you pass up when you see it on TV?

Mr. Sunshine Returns

Here in New England, we are on day #72 of rain, wind, and raw weather (which is fine in March, but my calendar says May.)

So, let me be your sunshine and keep you from snapping. Here are 10 things I'm happy about. You can be happy too.

1) The Bruins are still playing hockey. Usually, I make fun of hockey for still going on in May, but with the Bruins in, it feels perfectly OK. And fun.

2) I don't have a kid with Arnold Schwarzenegger. At least I don't think so.

3) (Shamless plug) Radio 92.9's Earthfest is Saturday. It's free and there might be some sunshine. I said "might."

4) The Red Sox are above .500 and the Cubs are coming to Fenway Park this weekend.  Classic Baseball.

5) Both John Lackey and Daisuke Matsuzaka are on the disabled list.   Note to the Sox: Please leave them on until November 1.

6) The final Oprah show airs next week. You can interpret this any you want.

7) The Hangover 2 comes out next weekend. Will it be as good as the first one? Probably not, but it can't be terrible, right?

8) Bob Dylan turns 70 next week. There's hope for us all. (Not a slam. I love Bob, but he's looked better. But so have I.)

9) At least once a week when I walk a mile to the train, someone I don't know stops and offers me a ride. I politely decline and tell them walking is my exercise. It redeems how I feel about people sometimes.

10) I'm alive, I can write this blog and I have great family and friends to read it. Who cares about bad weather when you have all that?

And for the record, it would be nice if it stopped raining soon. Thank you.  That is all.

I Wish I Knew How To Quit You

Why can't I give up on a show that just isn't as good as it used to be?    I mean, there are plenty of other  shows out there to watch.  Why do I stay with the ones that don't consistently deliver?    Is it because I've already invested so much time into them or do I hold out hope that they might reclaim their genius again?  I guess that's one for the therapy someday.

Yes, I'm referring to "The Office" and the recent unfunny stint by Will Farrell as Deangelo Vickers.  When I heard Steve Carell was leaving, I thought they might be jumping the shark, but I figured I'd flip the Will Farrell coin and give it a chance.  (Will Farrell coin=only about half of what Will Ferrell does is funny.  You know it's true.)
Sorry, but the character was creepy and disturbed. Yes, every other character on "The Office" is creepy and disturbed, but creepy and disturbed without funny is not a good combination.   Although last week's show (without Farrell) was better, I am a little worried.  Unless they actually make Creed the new manager...that would be AWESOME. Talk about taking creepy and disturbed and funny to a whole new level.

Was Steve Carell the be-all end-all?  Not sure, but he was part of an incredible ensemble cast where every part contributed to the whole.  Maybe they should have considered stopping on top.  Let the whole show say goodbye rather than try to extract one part and ruin the whole.   MASH did it, The Sopranos did it, Seinfeld did it, Friends did it, the Mary Tyler Moore Show did it.  I hope when it's time, The Simpsons will do it and Modern Family will do it.

I could take a stand by not watching anymore, but I've already got the Season Pass on my DVR and I feel like I'm letting someone down if I cancel it.  Gotta go, Dr. Melfi will see me now.

But I Won't Call Him King

Yes.  I'm bummed the Celtics are out of it.  But in reality, they had some injuries and who knows how far they could have gone anyway?   Again, we were lucky to still be watching basketball in May and we still have hockey (Go Bruins Saturday!) 

I really want to hate LeBron James.  There's a lot to hate.  That ridiculous ESPN show he did when he went to Miami, sticking it to the fans in Cleveland, was a complete joke.  Plus, using the R word at a press conference isn't too smart.  He's a great player who knows how great he is. He knows him team is moving on and ours insn't.
There's a lot to hate.

But after Wednesday's game, he actually showed class.  His post-game comments praised both the Celtics and his teammates.

Here's what he said to fashion flair Craig Sager of TNT.  "First of all, I wanna give a lot of thanks to the Boston Celtics. They make you work for every bit.  You can never take your foot off the gas. My respect for that team....Great team. I've got the utmost respect for this team. They're the reason the three of us came together."

Yep, I do hate him, but when he says things like that, it puts my hate on hold...until next year.

You Can't Kill Him

A year ago, Steven Tyler was a joke. He was falling off stages, in need of rehab, his band was looking for a new singer, and had become a caricature of himself.

What a difference a year makes. Now he's on the cover of magazines, has just released a juicy autobiography "Does The Noise In My Head Bother You?" and has a new single, "(It) Feels So Good" that might end up being one of the Top 40 jams of the summer. Oh yeah, he also just happens to be a judge on a little TV show called American Idol (remember the one everyone said no one would watch when some guy named Simon left?) and is winning him new fans who probably never even heard an Aerosmith song.

Even former big fans are still fans. I was a massive Aerosmith fan growing up. One of the first albums I owned was "Toys In The Attic."   "Toys" followed by "Rocks" is one of rock's greatest back-to back album releases. (By the way, without Aerosmith's "Toys In The Attic" and "Rocks" we don't have Guns & Roses "Appetite For Destruction." But I digress.) In reality, I haven't loved much of their music post-1987, but that's when they won over millions of new fans. 

The point is, Steven Tyler just endures. You have to respect his fight and the fact that he never stopped being himself.  He was down for the count in 1985 and came back. He was down for the count in 1996 and came back. He was down for the count in 2010 and came back.   Enjoy this "up" cycle of one of entertainments biggest stars. He'll probably go down and come back up again a couple more times before he's done.  Kind of like an elevator.

Bleep My Friends Said

As I think about my upbringing in Chicopee Ma, home of the World's Keilbasa Festival (don't look for it, it's not there anymore,) I sometimes laugh rememering all the classic lines I heard.

I have often thought "I should write a book." But that's a lot of work and I'd stress about it selling. And when it ends up on the discount table of Barnes & Noble, my ego would get bruised.

But a blog, I can do. If no one reads this, I'll never know, right?

Names have been witheld, mostly because I can't remember all the details.

One friend trying to convince another friend to stay at the party instead of going to work: "Just do what I did. Call in 'Dead Aunt.'"

Car full of 5 dudes approaches group of good looking girls. Inside the car someone says "Hey Joe, say something impressive to these chicks." Joe rolls down window and says "Hey, at least 2 of you, get in."

Hot July Day. Co-worker at Jiffy Lube eating a Big Mac before work starts at 8am. Me: "Where did you get a Big Mac at 7:45am?" Him: "In my trunk. I got it last night and kept it there." No, there was no cooler.

Math Teacher, obviously trying to pump up morale: "Sean Duffy, what's the answer to problem number 5? Trash can, what's the answer to problem number 5? Same answer. What a cooincidence."

Car full of dudes (again with this scenario) waking up at 7am after sleeping in car in front of house. One says "Wow, my mouth is dry. I could use a big frosty glass of orange juice." Sound of beer can being taken out of cooler and opened. Orange juice guy says "That'll do."

Person throws up out car window while driver drives. Driver, Chuck says: "Kind of smells like fish." Person who throws up says "Sorry, Chuck, I had fish for dinner." Chuck says "It's ok, I like fish."

Person thinks the drive through girl is cute. He hands her his money and says "I think you're hot," and burns rubber away from the window to imperss her. Me: "You realize she didn't give you your food yet, right."

A friend tells his 70+ year old grandmother he's getting a tattoo. Grandmother says: "Why don't you just get a big penis on your forehead, becaue that's what you are."

I'm sure you have some funny ones, too. Unlike a discount book, you can share yours below.

Not To Get Political....

Those that know me know I'm not very political. Even with the world's recent happenings, I'm not going to start now.  It's not my thing.  

But I will say this....

As an American, I am relieved that Osama Bin Laden cannot personally spread more evil.  I am very proud of the men and women of our military and my thoughts are with family of lost soldiers and victims of all wars.

Here are two of the best things I read yesterday about the Bin Laden mission.  One is funny.  One makes you think.

Here is what Steve Martin says Bin Laden is enjoying now.   Laugh out loud funny.

Here is a blog by great writer and thinker Lauren LaRocque.  It mixes fact with heartfelt emotion and makes you think.  It's what great writing does.

Tomorrow I'm going back to stupid stuff.  I'm much better at that.